Go on a Bloody Diet!
by Hollyn Okumura
Summary: In a drunken, upset haste, Arthur gets behind the wheel and ultimately ends up in the hospital. Alfred, very much concerned for his health, makes a deal with Arthur on the Brit's terms. He'll go on a diet if Arthur stops drinking. [[USUK/human names]]
1. Chapter 1

**I'm back again with another non-depressing USUK story. Not much to say here... Please review if you want more~.**

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Arthur let out a groan. His eyelids felt like they had been screwed shut, and the pounding in his head was as if something was caught inside his skull and bashing his brain with a hammer. The pain hit him like a truck upon waking up. He hadn't even opened his usually brilliant, green eyes yet.

This was more than just a normal hangover. The light-blond Brit knew that. What he didn't know, or didn't remember was what had happened the previous night, where he was now, or what he was even doing before he was drinking.

"Artie… You awake, dude?" He was unable to completely register the speaker, but whoever it was sounded as if he were talking in a hushed way, thankfully. Too bad it wasn't very much of a help. The whispered words were so sharp he felt like someone had just driven a stake through his brain. The Englishman let out another unpleasant sounding groan. His throat hurt now too. No doubt when he opened his eyes or tried to move, that'd cause even more pain.

"How are you feeling?"

Arthur opened his mouth to respond, rather than just moan, as he wasn't getting his point across that he didn't want to be bothered very clearly. Nothing came out. Just a choked, raspy breath.

Silence. For the next eternity it seemed, Arthur remained quiet, and so did the other chap sitting beside him. Finally he brought himself to crack his heavy eyelids open, only to immediately shut them as his vision was blurred with bright white lights. He tried moving his hand up to shield his eyes, but it was no use. He couldn't move his hand.

"Oh, here, lemme help!" Arthur waited a moment and then picked up on the lack of brightness now in the room through his eyelids. He forced them open again at a snail's pace. At first things were either very sharp and doubled, or blurred and melted together. He really didn't get a clear focus on anything until he cut his eyes to the side at the other man who was leaning close to his flushed face.

The blue-eyed American came into focus. It was Alfred! What was he doing here at his house? Were they even at his house?

"A-alfred?" Arthur choked out in a rough whisper.

"Shh, yes. I'm here."

"What-" The Englishman had to stop and breathe. Talking was harder than he thought.

"After you visited me… I guess you left and went to a bar. You were driving on the wrong side of the road and got in a head-on crash," Alfred informed him, trying to keep his loudness down.

Arthur took a few moments to think about this. He didn't recall any of it. Ahhhh… wait. Now he sort of remembered. It was still pretty foggy. He had been at Alfred's house. They'd been watching some stupid movie together, and Arthur had tried to be… romantic. Alfred was just too oblivious. When he left he was pretty frustrated but Alfred had been unaware of that too!

"Th-this is your… bloody fault!" England choked again, sort of hissing. It was hard to make it out, but from what he could tell the American looked slightly shocked. He didn't say anything, though. He just sat there with his mouth ajar like the ignorant fool he was.

"I-I... n-no… If I had known you went out drinking afterwards I woulda gone to drive you!" Even though the American was quick to defend himself, he was obviously trying his hardest to keep his voice low. No matter that. Arthur wanted him to shut up all together. He tried to not focus on Alfred for a moment and zoned out, eventually falling back asleep.

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"Hey," said Alfred from the doorway. This drew Arthur's attention from gazing out the window from his propped up position on the stiff hospital bed. He watched Alfred with tired eyes that looked like they'd barely had any sleep despite the copious amounts he'd gotten in the last few days.

"Good morning, Alfred." Arthur didn't sound too enthused at his presence.

"You get a good rest while I was gone? I kept comin' to visit you but you were like asleep every time I came."

"No. I've gotten horrible sleep."

"Oh… Sorry."

"Everything… hurts…"

"Well… If it makes you feel any better I haven't gotten any sleep either."

"How does that make anything better?"

"Well I dunno. I just thought," Alfred paused and shrugged, "you'd wanna know that I've been worried about you. I've been up late every night in case there's something that happens with you."

"Oh." There was a pause. "Well… Why would I want to know that?" The Brit asked, another pause following. Alfred just shook his head and gave a slight shrug.

"Arthur… If nothing else… I really want you to stop drinking." Arthur narrowed his eyes but listened. "When it lands you in the hospital… I just don't like seeing you like this."

"I should hope you don't! And besides! I can stop anytime I want to. I just choose not-"

"No, I don't think you can, dude. I'm really being serious. And I've come up with an idea." Arthur stared at him. Another one of Alfred's super ideas? Great. Arthur just rolled his forest green eyes.

"Fine then. Let's hear it."

"Well I was thinking it was about time I, ya know, went on a diet," Alfred started, lowering his blond head.

"That may be true but what does this have to do with me?"

"Erm well I was thinking that maybe we could do it together." Alfred looked up again, at Arthur, his blue eyes sparkling. "Except you'd not drink and I'd go on a more… restricted diet. So that way we won't be alone in doing it and you keep telling me to go on a diet so that could be your motivation, and you not drinking for my diet could be mine."

Arthur had to admit. That idea wasn't half bad. Alfred really did need to stop over-eating. A diet would be great for him. And even though he had been frustrated at him, he still did care about Alfred's health. He knew that this was mainly for his own benefit to stop drinking, but he could use this. And have fun with it. This was definitely one of the better ideas that popped into Alfred's head.

"So?"

"Alright. I agree. This could work." Arthur could just see Alfred's face lighting up slightly.

"Awesome, du-"

"Ah-ah! Wait. There need to be terms! I get tell you what you can eat. And if you slip up… I get to drink for whatever things you caved into." Yes… And he knew this diet would be difficult for Alfred. The American would probably wind up failing at one point and he'd get to enjoy some alcoholic beverage of his choosing. Of course, everything he planned on making Alfred eat was healthy. Nothing harmful. Not even burnt scones if he didn't want them.

"Alright! Deal!"

"And!" Arthur paused. Was he really going to add this? It was a good opportunity… A great chance really for him to draw them together. "When I recover enough to leave. I want us to stay together so we can make sure we don't give in and don't tell the other."

"You mean like… live together?" Alfred asked, blinking, a little bit... surprised.

"Erm well, for a time. I suppose that's what I mean. You know, until we both get on better tracks."

"Alright… That's cool, but can we stay mostly at my place?"

"Mostly."

"Cool! Then we've got a deal!"

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**Ohohoho... First Chapter! I can't give you a rough estimation about how long this one will be, so for right now I'm just leaving the length undecided.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you all for the reviews and follows and faves and stuff! ^.^ I'm glad you guys like it! 3 Erm... I'm not sure how I feel like this chapter. It's not the most exciting but it is kinda important. Keep up the reviews~**

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Alfred shifted his weight a little bit under Arthur's arm. He helped the injured man to the couch and sat him down on one side. Arthur sat back and let out s strained breath.

"You good, dude?" Alfred asked. Arthur nodded without saying anything. "Alright cool… Ummm…" The blue-eyed blond paused and looked around. "I'll go get some pillows and blankets and stuff so you can get comfy." And with that, Alfred headed up the stairs to retrieve some spare pillows and a quilt from a closet in the hallway.

Arthur sat in silence while he waited alone. He didn't just sit there and do nothing, however. The Brit took this time to examine the details of Alfred's house. He'd been there many times before but usually it seemed a bit more tidy. The Brit just assumed that Alfred had been too busy making arrangements and preparations for them to live together for a time to really keep the place up. He inhaled deeply. The room smelled like Alfred. That wasn't a bad thing. In fact, he very much enjoyed Alfred's scent being all around him. He'd even miss it once he grew used to it… If he wound up staying there long enough to do so anyway.

It wasn't long before Alfred was back down, balancing the quilt and what looked like maybe four pillows on his arms. He set them down on the coffee table in front of the sofa, handing them to Arthur one by one so he could get comfortable. Lastly, he threw the quilt up, over, and down on Arthur, who had brought his legs up on the sofa, lying on his good one.

"Until you're ready or want to move, or you can get up the stairs, you can just lie here on the couch." The American placed the remote for the TV on the arm of the couch so it was just above Arthur's head and within reach. "And if you don't feel like TV I've got some magazines and books somewhere too!"

"Thank you Alfred, I'll let you know if I grow bored."

"'Kay dude! I'm gonna make something… Is there anything prefer?"

"Well… How about a salad? It wouldn't be fair for you to make something and watch me eat it while you get none, would it?"

"Oh yeah… diet… right. I'll make a salad for us then. What can it have on it?"

"Blueberries, pecans, a slight amount of cheese… A very light dressing if one at all… And that's about all I can think of at the moment."

"Bluberries?"

"Yes. They make a lovely salad topping."

"Well whatever… So just a salad for lunch? That doesn't sound like very much," Alfred sighed.

"Are you thinking about giving in this early?"

"No! I won't! I'll just eat this salad."

"You can have an appropriate sized serving. No more than that until dinner time which will be when I see fit. If I'm giving up drinking… I'm not going to make this easy for you!"

"Ahhh, yeah… I gotcha," Alfred said, waving his hand slightly, as he made his way into the kitchen.

"And don't even think about sneaking any snacks," Arthur said with a devious smirk.

"Yeah, yeah." Alfred got out a salad bowl and retrieve some lettuce from the fridge, not even trying to get anything else. "I'm gonna starve," he muttered to himself as he rummaged around for the other ingredients Arthur requested. Blueberries still seemed like an odd thing to mix with a salad, but if Arthur suggested it… Wait a minute… Arthur was no cook. How'd he know what would go well on a salad? Hmmm? This was the same Brit who thought Marmite was delightful on toast. Alfred didn't understand why he liked the stuff so much. To him it was foul.

Blueberries, dressing, pecans, cheese, and lettuce… It was a salad… Just throwing stuff in a bowl. Maybe it wouldn't be too bad since Arthur wasn't the one making it, at least. Alfred tossed it lazily and then put it on two plates. "I'm gonna starve," He repeated with a sigh. Arthur really was cracking down.

When he returned to the living room where Arthur lay he set one plate in front of Arthur and took the other in his lap. When Arthur couldn't reach it, the American rolled his eyes and scooted it closer to him as the Brit sat up and successfully reached for it.

"Thank you." The two ate in silence, before Arthur set down his half-full plate and spoke up again, "Maybe, when I'm able to get around more easily, I can start doing my own cooking and baking for you. Not having to cook your own dietary meals might help."

Alfred shot him a glance, "Yeah. Maybe," he muttered. Alfred had already practically inhaled his portion of the salad. He put the now empty dish on the table.

"I think," Arthur started, "That because I won't be able to stick around all day everyday because of my work and meetings and what not, I shall establish a list of things you can and can't eat and the proportions you can eat them in."

Alfred nodded in agreement. He hoped this helped Arthur get over his drinking problem. He REALLY hoped it would.

"I would like to go ahead and establish that most of what you eat now, you won't be able to eat on your diet."

"Figured."

Arthur frowned and paused for a moment. Alfred wasn't even arguing with him. Was his not drinking really that important to Alfred? He knew how much the American loved eating… "Ahem. Well… Maybe occasionally I'll let you have a reward." Alfred seemed to perk up at this. "We are just trying to control your over-eating and other eating habits so I don't see anything wrong with it…" Arthur paused.

"But they'll be few and far in between though. And small in size."

"Wait…" Alfred seemed to grow unamused. "If let me have a small 'reward' occasionally… Does that mean I have to let you have a small reward too? Because staying sober and dieting is different. It takes a lot more for me to gain weight back than it does for you to get drunk… I mean… You don't exactly have the highest tolerance."

"I realize that. And you do not have to seeing as you are trying to make a point," Arthur commented. He was saying this now, because perhaps Alfred would be just lenient enough in the future to allow him little awards here and there as well. Arthur's theory was that seeing that he wasn't eager to drink and saying he didn't need to have rewards, Alfred would be proud of him and just let him have at least one drink. Maybe two…

"Oh… Ok…" Alfred gave a short nod and then leaned back. Even if Arthur did reward him along the way without him allowing him some sort of award as well… he'd feel pretty bad about him getting something when he didn't let Arthur have anything. Maybe he'd just not accept the rewards at all and then he'd feel better about it.

"Alfred, do you mind if I take a nap?"

"No, not at all dude. I'll just go play some video games or somethin'." Alfred got up and gestured to Arthur's plate as he grabbed his own. "Ya finished?"

Arthur nodded. "If you wish, you can have the rest." Alfred pumped his first up and ate the rest of Arthur's salad before returning the dishes to the sink and going up to his room to game.


End file.
